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If you don’t have pets, you might not get this

February 3, 2014

Gilligan is having his teeth cleaned today. This is something that happens every year because he has terrible teeth. I’d like to do it more, but he bites anyone who comes near them- hard. Anesthesia it is and there is a limit to how much of that I’m willing to put him through.

Like I said, this happens once a year. I’m often uncomfortable, but today I am downright panicked. Hormones? Maybe. More than likely though it’s a combination of things. My regular vet no longer does surgeries, Gilly and I both love her, so this will be the first time he goes under without her since I got him. This is also the first time I’ve been home without a single dog in years and it’s painful.

I’ve often said that Gilligan is doing me a favor by hanging out and living with me. It’s a joke that makes sense if you know him. But it’s not too far from the truth. I know I need him. I know he’s saved me, more than vice versa. But not having him here today, in the quiet emptiness of our little house, I am hyper aware of the depths of joy and love and comfort he brings me.

When we lost Princess I didn’t think I could get through pregnancy without her. I didn’t know how I could get through anything without her. In her absence Gilligan blossomed and became more affectionate, maybe for me but maybe just because he  prefers being the only dog (a suspicion I’ve had for a while). The thing is, for a long time, it was just the two of us. I didn’t know how to have a dog or care for another living being, he had to teach me. He didn’t know how to have a person and not attempt escapes all the time, I had to teach him. With other dogs around, I think I took that connection for granted.

Even in sadness and loss I’m glad we have it back. I’ve been so utterly grateful for him in the last few months, but, again, these hours without him are showing me a whole new level.


3 Comments leave one →
  1. February 3, 2014 3:19 pm

    I totally totally understand what you’re saying. People who don’t have pets just can’t understand the bond between pet and owner; it’s a very special thing. I have a dog who is sadly nearing the end of his life and I don’t know how I will deal with it once he is gone. Even thinking about not having him here is too much to bear. That quiet scares me… just a house without the pitter patter of paws. It seems so empty.
    I wish you luck with your little one.. he will be okay, even though the vet will not be there this time! I know how scary it can be to leave them in unfammiliar hands!

  2. nooneknowsthisishere permalink
    February 5, 2014 2:36 pm

    absolutely get this. Had my boyfriend’s mam mind my little terrier for a night recently. it was our first night apart since I got him. I was heartbroken! Brando, on the other hand, barely noticed. At least your guy will come home with sparkly teeth! 🙂


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