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True Partner

September 22, 2016

Since giving birth:

The laundry has been caught up on.

We have yet to go to bed with dishes in the sink.

The sheets have been changed and the bed made daily.

Eli has eaten well* and brushed his teeth twice daily.

Boxes have gone to Goodwill.

Cemented fence bits and a rusty who-knows-what has been dug up and discarded.

I’m sure there’s more that I’m forgetting.

Thing I’ve done since giving birth:

Breastfed, changed diapers, tried to rest, cuddled both babies, and made lentils.

Cyrus has done everything on that first list and more. He has made our house a nice place to be and kept the wheels turning.

I write this not to brag (but, yes, I’m incredibly lucky), but to share my conflict about it all. When I see Cyrus running ragged while I sit nursing I feel guilty. I feel like I should be helping instead of sitting, laying down, or making messes. Is this just a me thing? Or a female thing? Or a societal thing?

I know that my body is working hard and that I’m exhausted, but I feel like I should be doing more. Or helping more. Something more. Is this just a new parent thing?

*Though I’d give him more veggies.

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